Little Sophie played in the small pile of sand behind the thick wall of prickly green bushes. This was her place. Where she created figures and friends for no one but her. She would watch them romp and roll in the sand and then dissolve into a new beings altogether.
But this day was different. Instead of playing in the sand, she sat in her mother’s lap and watched her friends play. Daddy was there too. Sophie’s arms began to hurt because of how hard her mother was holding her. She tried to play, but Daddy would tell her to keep quiet. We can’t play right now.
Sophie wanted to ask why her Mother was crying, but never got the chance. Sophie’s Daddy kissed her Mother and ran out into the unhidden backyard.
Sophie’s Mother picked her up and ran away from Daddy as fast as she could. Sophie didn’t know why they couldn’t run with Daddy or why she heard a crack of lightning even though it wasn’t raining. But she liked it when her mother carried her, and was glad to not be sitting still for a while.
I enjoyed that this piece and the situation was told from the perspective of the child. It was truly unique. I was a little confused what exactly happened when both the mother and the father were described as running; perhaps some clarification would help during this important section.
ReplyDeleteI realize the narrator is supposed to be unreliable, and I like how slowly I realized Sophie's family was in danger, but I think this piece could be expanded so the reader has more access to what's happening--more, maybe, than Sophie does. This might be me being selfish, because of course as a reader I want to know what happened. That is definitely my preference. But I do love the POV here.
ReplyDeleteWe get this lens put over the entire piece--the naive views of little Sophie--which has an interesting effect on what exactly we are told and what we can interpret. A lot can be interpreted from this piece, like the ambiguous "lightning strike" (a gunshot?) It provides a lot of fun for the reader, as a lot is left up to his or her interpretation ; he or she has to take on the thought process of a child.
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